Mitt Romney

One of the great mysteries of election 2012 so far is, how the hell was Team Romney so completely unprepared for Team Obama's withering attacks on his past at Bain capital, his tax returns, his off-shore bank accounts, and his general Richie Rich persona? Romney ran against Ted Kennedy in Massachusetts in the '90s and the Obama campaign has basically been repeating that playbook, so they can't claim they didn't see this coming. Whether or not the Obama slams on Bain Capital are distortions or “unfair”, they're hardly the same thing as calling a Vietnam war hero a treasonous liar, yet that's...

The best part about the end of the presidential election other than the end of a presidential election is speculating about who will run in the next presidential election. In the wake of their sound defeat at the polls, the Republicans are especially interesting because everyone who will likely run is already running. The dynamics are just too interesting to not get into it, and I warn you, this little game I'm about to play is going to be intense and weird. By 2016 - in all likelihood - a popular two-term Democratic president will be retiring, and conservatives will...

Something this election year really disturbs me. It's not the super PAC spending or that Mitt Romney hasn't released 10 years' worth of tax returns. (What are we supposed to find out? That he's rich?) It's that a guy's American success story is now being used against him. Any other time, a guy like Romney, the presumptive Republican presidential nominee, would be admired as a great example to follow. After receiving a juris doctorate and a master's of business administration, he became a financial success by building an investment company from the ground up. He then went on to manage the...

Rather than going to war with the Obama administration over the "fiscal cliff," what the Republican Party should really do is take me to lunch. While much hoo-ha has been made over Mitt Romney's electoral evisceration by Hispanic and female voters, what should really worry the GOP brass is how poorly he performed with my generation. The Pew Research Center's exhaustive study of the youth vote reads like a Republican campfire horror story. I know it will be difficult to take advice from a guy who still sleeps on a mattress on the floor, but I'm telling you, Republicans, take me out in Wicker Park.

The world has long been clamoring for a proper collaboration of Chicagoans Kanye West and R. Kelly, and thankfully the leadoff track from the newly leaked G.O.O.D. Music mixtape "Cruel Summer" delivers just that. "To The World" evokes images of beauty like vast skies, sunsets and sounds like it could be from an anti-bullying PSA. Until the words hit. There's a soaring chorus from R. Kelly backed by majestic strings and keys, all while Kelz kindly reminds everyone "Deuces minus one/ Middle finger to the sky tonight.

Fox and "The Simpsons" are doing their part to get the vote out. Well, maybe. A new "Simpsons" video short hits on such issues as voter-ID laws, health care and outsourcing. In the clip, doughnut-loving Homer heads to the polls to vote for either Barack Obama or Mitt Romney. "Why do we have to choose our leaders?" he says. "Isn't that what we have the Supreme Court for?" Like many voters, Homer doesn't seem completely pleased with his options. "He promised me death panels and Grandpa's still alive!"

I really love it when Real Life aligns perfectly with stuff I'm working on. Take the selection of Paul Ryan as Mitt Romney's running mate. I would say “Mitt Romney's selection of Paul Ryan as his running mate,” but this is clearly not what happened. It's not even a question that Romney came under a pressure campaign from influential conservative ideologues to select the guy who wants to be the architect of the demise of the New Deal. Essentially Mitt Romney is not running to be president but the Tea Party's Perfect Bitch (And how vain was Kardashian to think...

President Obama poked fun at his Republican rivals at Saturday night's White House Correspondents' Dinner in Washington, but didn't spare his own Secret Service, secretary of state or even his past indulgence of exotic cuisine as he delivered remarks before a crowd of Hollywood stars, political power brokers and journalists. Jimmy Kimmel hosted the event and doled out his own skewerings, but kept things relatively low key in comparison with 2011 host Seth Meyers' roastings. Check out some of their best quips from the night.  Obama "Four years ago, I was locked in a brutal primary battle with...

Emmy host Jimmy Kimmel took shots at Republican presidential nominee Mitt Romney and "Mad Men" star Jon Hamm's Emmy losing streak, among others, during his four-minute opening monologue. Here are some of his best jokes. "'Downton Abbey' is an amazing show ... It really gives you a sense of what it must have been like to grow up in Mitt Romney's house. " "Being a Republican in Hollywood is like being a Chick-fil-A sandwich on the snack table at 'Glee.'" "Television is an American institution, yet one out of every five actors here tonight is British.

When sports teams suffer postseason defeats, the pre-printed merchandise celebrating their would-be championships is often shipped off to impoverished countries. That means there's still a Bears 2007 Super Bowl champions hat floating around out there that would have gone on Rex Grossman's stupid head. In the case of losing presidential merchandise, however, the results aren't always so kind. The Postcard Factory, which produced election swag for both candidates, destroys whatever is left from the losing side.

When sports teams suffer postseason defeats, the pre-printed merchandise celebrating their would-be championships is often shipped off to impoverished countries. That means there's still a Bears 2007 Super Bowl champions hat floating around out there that would have gone on Rex Grossman's stupid head. In the case of losing presidential merchandise, however, the results aren't always so kind. The Postcard Factory, which produced election swag for both candidates, destroys whatever is left from the losing side.

As the electoral margins on the giant screen looming over the Thompson Center grew closer, so did the bodies huddled beneath it. Attendees of the downtown Chicago rally tried to stay warm on a relentlessly rainy, windy Tuesday night. The weather thinned the turnout, but not the enthusiasm, as the crowd cut through the air with rousing cheers for blue, while red results received a smattering of boos. Draped in an American flag featuring an Obama-as-Batman caricature, Wrigelyville resident Chris Breiler raised his arms and...

RedEye columnist Stephen Markley sends thoughts, observations and musings from the rally in Chicago on election night. 11:07 p.m.:  We are now packed in even tighter, and I'm looking around hoping the Fire Marshall had his shit together when he was planning this. The body odor is especially acute because everyone has been jumping around, dancing and generally reveling. We await Mitt Romney's concession speech, mostly because we all want to hear Obama's speech and then go get drunk.

You probably won't find them at the bar downing shots of Patron or at Starbucks waiting for a double-shot espresso, but if you think the closest you've ever been to a Mormon is a Mitt Romney bumper sticker, you're probably wrong. As Romney, a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, travels the presidential campaign trail, and the musical "The Book of Mormon" comes to Chicago, it's Mormonism's time to shine. The more than 14 million members the LDS church counts worldwide-including 4,600 members in the Chicago area-make it a prominent Christian religion, and shows like...

Last night's presidential debate was a controversial one, as most modern political events tend to be these days. One of the biggest talkers coming out of the first debate was GOP contender Mitt Romney straight up admitting that he's going to cut PBS from the budget if he's elected to office. Like most people watching the debate under the age of 46, I was devastated. Here's the thing: I'm not here to discuss how odd it was that eliminating PBS was the first thing Romney went to when talking about things to cut from the budget.

To plug myself, in “ The Great Dysmorphia ” following my adventure at a Republican presidential debate, I wrote: “If a presidential debate is pure farce than the media coverage is farce on top of farce - 69ing farce.” You don't have to be on mushrooms to see how that insight applies to the first debate of the general election. As far as Mitt Romney “winning” the debate goes, I am not so deluded as to think that President Obama did not come off as listless and uninterested during his answers while Romney appeared plucky and eager to take it to...

If someone would have walked up to Jay-Z on the day he started his rap career and said, "One day, the president of the United States will introduce you at your own music festival," I am sure Young Hov would not have believed it. Yet nobody seemed to find this surprise unusual when it happened in Philadelphia during Labor Day weekend. Well, except the angry folks who vented online about President Obama "hanging out with an ex-drug dealer. " Those folks seem to have forgotten that George H.W. Bush once invited the "original gangster," Eazy-E, to the White House for grub back in 1991.

Emmy host Jimmy Kimmel took shots at Republican presidential nominee Mitt Romney and "Mad Men" star Jon Hamm's Emmy losing streak, among others, during his four-minute opening monologue. Here are some of his best jokes. "'Downton Abbey' is an amazing show ... It really gives you a sense of what it must have been like to grow up in Mitt Romney's house. " "Being a Republican in Hollywood is like being a Chick-fil-A sandwich on the snack table at 'Glee.'" "Television is an American institution, yet one out of every five actors here tonight is British.

Fox and "The Simpsons" are doing their part to get the vote out. Well, maybe. A new "Simpsons" video short hits on such issues as voter-ID laws, health care and outsourcing. In the clip, doughnut-loving Homer heads to the polls to vote for either Barack Obama or Mitt Romney. "Why do we have to choose our leaders?" he says. "Isn't that what we have the Supreme Court for?" Like many voters, Homer doesn't seem completely pleased with his options. "He promised me death panels and Grandpa's still alive!"