You are here: Home>Collections

Summer lovin' like the movies

OPINION

  • "Grease"
"Grease"
July 17, 2013|By Nikki Pierce, @nikkinikkip | For RedEye

We all want our summer love lives to be movie-esque, and with warm weather easing out, some of us may be wondering if and when we'll find our Danny Zuko/Sandy Olsson. Unfortunately, real life isn't the movies, but if it were, we might be learning lessons like this.

'Grease'

It's too hot for pleather, and no one hand-jives anymore, unless you're warming up for a game of Rock Paper Scissors. Besides learning that mechanics work best to choreographed dance numbers, ultimately, Grease taught us that in order to land the person of your dreams (who was originally interested in you, but then shunned you once his friends were around), you need to change absolutely everything about who you are, start smoking and say super-hip phrases like, "Tell me about it ... stud."

Modern-day advice: Keep the cardigan and hair band. Rock the sweater vest and khakis. Eventually, your "type" will come along, and you two can fly off in a newly furnished convertible into blissful Forever Clouds.

'Summer School'

From this 1987 classic, we found that summer responsibilities CAN be fun, even when you're forced to ditch your previously planned trip to Hawaii with your young, hot girlfriend and teach a bunch of teens who look too old for high school. Also, by the power of sheer love between co-workers, you can cure dyslexia! Oh, and ... it's A-OK to live with your teacher.

Modern-day advice: Do NOT move in with your professor/boss. Let's be honest; it's hard enough to deal with this person daily at work, and living with anyone besides yourself usually means you have to do things like "respect space" and "wear clothes." Why mess with double sets of labeled plastic food containers? Also, if you're going to fall in love with a co-worker, make sure he or she is not running you over on job duties, even if they promise you an overly romantic "From Here to Eternity" kiss in exchange.

'Camp'

This movie might be most like real life sans musical numbers, but instead of Stephen Sondheim, your set of friends has a joint acquaintance with manners and tact, that you all agree to put your best self forward for. This movie leads us to believe that absolutely everyone is bonkers, you can backstab your friends as long as you have a skill to back it up, and as long as you admit you're crazy to the people you've hatefully wronged, they'll forgive you and offer up an impromptu swim party.

Modern-day advice: Never replace Snapple with Woolite; I don't care how much you dislike someone. Also, let's just accept everyone and not be crazy. Sound good? Great.

'Dirty Dancing'

This movie is full of gem-like lessons: Nobody puts Baby in a corner. Know your dance space. The Catskill Mountains don't offer a lot of places with proper air conditioning. Success will come when you least expect it (even if you haven't been close to success the entire process) if you put your trust in teamwork, and your team partner is strong, of a higher skill level and believes that rules don't apply to him.

Modern-day advice: If you or anyone you know is in need of any sort of medical procedure, please seek proper medical attention from, let's say, a doctor, and not a random friend who says he knows what he's doing.

'I Know What You Did Last Summer'

We all know the only lesson to learn here is that karma is a relentless wench.

Modern-day advice: Karma is a relentless wench. Be good and good will come back to you. Be bad and, well, you and everyone close to you will experience a three-part series of gory details.

So don't be bad! Enjoy wholeheartedly what's left of summer, and when in doubt, always go for the lift.

Nikki Pierce is a RedEye special contributor.

Need to give your dating life a boost? Sign up for RedEye Dating.

Want more? Discuss this article and others on RedEye's Facebook page

RedEye Chicago Articles
|
|
|