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Maria Kanellis invites Chicago to Ring of Honor's "Night of Hoopla"

July 07, 2013|Maria Kanellis, for Geek To Me

The stars of Ring of Honor (ROH) are returning to the Chicago area and today we have special guest blogger in Maria Kanellis - AKA "The First Lady" of ROH:

Next week in at 115 Bourbon Street in Chicago, Ring of Honor wrestlers will have the chance to let it all hang out – literally – at “A Night of Hoopla.” This is the first event of its kind for Ring of Honor and is guaranteed to be a wild night of pro wrestling full of debauchery and madness; from dancing to pants-less refereeing (including yours truly!).

“A Night of Hoopla” will see Cheeseburger making his in-ring debut, and probably having his retirement match in the process. The skinny, wimpy, timid, no good, disrespectful, smelly, unimpressive – did I mention stinky? – Cheeseburger-eater is only going to embarrass himself in his debut match.

And in an inter-gender tag match, pants-less referee match, “Unbreakable” Michael Elgin, BJ Whitmer and MsChif take on ACH, TaDarious Thomas and Athena. (I’d like to see MsChif with her pants off, personally.)

Also at “A Night of Hoopla,” making his way from the shadows to grace us with his impeccable diction and in-ring ingenuity will be none other than Delirious! I predict his match will be the match of the night, no doubt – but the real question is will Delirious be wearing pants?

I bet ROH World TV Champion Matt Taven will probably parade around like he’s something special with a couple of Hotties on each arm – or should I say Truth Martini and his big Book of Truth. Taven himself is nothing more than a despised “champion” too afraid to face a real man like the talented Michael Bennett. Matt Taven stinks as bad as some members of his entourage – and let me tell you, I smell fish. That Hoopla chic Scarlet thinks she can try to steal the spotlight as Ring of Honor’s sexiest red-head, but she will always be stuck at number three behind me, ROH’s First Lady, with of course number two being Veda Scott.

The event will be hosted by The Pants-less One himself, Truth Martini, and while all-ages are welcome, parental guidance is STRONGLY advised.

The night will include $1.50 domestic bottle and $2.50 Long Island drink specials that might make you forget it all the next day, but the trashy - albeit sexy - Hoopla Hotties appearing in the Pants-Off-Dance-Off are sure to help you recall some of it! And of course, I’ll be partaking in the hoopla as a pants-less referee so you’ll definitely be remembering this night for the rest of your life!

From top to no-bottoms, this is a show that you CANNOT miss! Trust me, I know business – and this is GOOD business! And don’t forget: "What happens at Hoopla stays at Hoopla." So leave your pants at home and I'll see you at A Night of Hoopla!

Sincerely,

THE FIRST LADY, Maria Kanellis
@MariaLKanellis

Ring of Honor UNAUTHORIZED Presents:
“A Night of Hoopla”
Thursday, July 11 @ 7:30 p.m.
115 Bourbon Street
3359 West 115th Street
Merrionette Park, IL 60803

Tickets: http://www.rohwrestling.com/product/chicago-il-july-11th

(Also available at the door)

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