What's turning Ryan Lochte on?

Also, what are his major turn-offs? We took a guess...

April 17, 2013|By Dana Moran | RedEye

Jeah girl, it's like he's living in there now! Highly decorated Olympic swimmer and all-around village idiot Ryan Lochte's new show, "What Would Ryan Lochte Do?" premieres at 9 p.m. Sunday, which means only one thing: huge publicity blitz. Ryan talked to Cosmo about his turn-ons (independence) and turn-offs (smoking) when it comes to the ladies. We've got some ideas of our own about Lochte's likes and don't-likes, as Chief Keef would say.


LIKES

 -- Multiple piercings (where Mom can't see them)

 -- Synchronized divers (double the fun, JEAH!)

 -- Glittery baseball caps

 -- Good cooks (PB&J for LIFE)

 -- Booty dancing (bounce bounce, bounce bounce JEAH!)

 -- Slutty librarians (so much to teach me!)

 -- That genie chick who lives in a lamp on "I Dream of Jeannie"

DON'T LIKES

 -- Large animal tattoos. They scare me in the dark!

 -- Water polo players

 -- Cargo pants

 -- Michael Phelps' mom

 -- Redheads (Full of trouble)

 -- Regular librarians (too much to teach me!)

 -- Jasmine from "Aladdin" (does she ever stop talking?)


damoran@tribune.com > | @redeyedana

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