Robert DeNiro said it best in "Goodfellas": "It's gonna be a good summa!" He was referring to your 2012 White Sox.
Game on, red-hot winners of eight straight.
First, no wimps please. For those concerned about Chris Sale's pitch count, stick it in your you-know-what. He's a kid. He's fine. And besides, if his arm falls off, the Sox will reclaim him and rehab him—it's what they're best at. Questions? See Philip Humber and Jake Peavy. In fact, I can't wait to see Sale after the arm surgery. He'll be better. Relax!
Second, we may need some help. "We'll need to see more attendance" management says.
Boo-hoo, I say. Like all, real, true, die-hard Sox fans, I never go to the games. What I'm calling for instead is a citywide pledge drive. Please send checks to:
White Sox summer drive: 2012
Every little bit helps.
Third: Take your time, Brent Morel. Your sub-.200 bat isn't missed. We'll make do.
Cubs manager Dale Sveum texted Sox manager Robin Venture: "Nice Job." My response would be: "Sorry, man. Sucks to be you."
In the bizarre world we live in, somehow the Cubs are packing 30,000 a game. Our tolerance (appetite?) for mediocrity is astounding. Glad we had another ceremony involving goats the other day. I honestly thought we were through with this junk. No, wait, let's do a spiritual cleansing. Light some candles. Pray to the Greek gods of mediocrity. Then join the mass of mediocrity that shows up every day.
One thing's for sure at Wrigley: You'll never be lonely.
Patrick Kane will never be lonely either. He's got friends in Madison. Blackhawks GM Stan Bowman says he's "disappointed" in the Kane incident. He should be "disappointed" in Kane's ceiling as a player. Hint: It's lower than you think. And if you think he's a No. 2 center, Bowman will not only be "disappointed" he also will be "unemployed."
Since its football season, however, this is all small talk. Gabe Carimi sat out (gasp!) OTA workouts, but he's back on the field. It's the most talented Bears team since the '80s—forgive my exuberance.
firstname.lastname@example.org | Bag Boy is a RedEye special contributor.