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Rapper Curren$y's snack rap

Curren$y With: The Jets, featuring Smoke DZA, Fiend 4 da Money, Corner Boy P, Trademark and Young Roddy When: 8 p.m. doors open, 9 p.m. show, Wednesday Where: Metro, 3730 N. Clark St. Tickets: $21

18 over

May 22, 2012|By Kyle Kramer, for RedEye

The rapper Curren$y tends to focus on a fairly specific set of lyrical topics -- planes, fast cars, hanging out at home, and a certain natural supplement that, when smoked, makes those planes fly a little higher, those cars drive a little slower, and that hanging out at home feel just a little chiller. But when Curren$y (alternately self-designated as Spitta) raps "Xbox Web Browser/download an updated NBA roster/play an 82 game season/condo full of snacks/Spitta not leaving," he makes us wonder, above all, just what types of snacks a day at his condo might entail. To prepare for his Wednesday show at Metro, we decided to put together a guide to three styles of getting the munchies so that you can choose the perfect snack to share with Spitta.

The Comfort Food Option
The Down to Business Option
The High End Option

Beverages
CFO: "Half rosé chandon/OJ in my glass/mimosa" (from "American Aquarium"). You bring the champagne, Curren$y guarantees unlimited juice. Yes, it will be off the hook.
DBO: Want to have some real talk with Curren$y? There's a drink order for that: "My type of [bleep]/she ran her story to me over grape juice and Ciroc sips" ("She Don't Want a Man").
HEO: "Tribeca at Bubby's, I'm enjoying a lemon press/Not that Minute Maid crap/They squeeze these lemons theyself" ("Roasted"). Artisanal lemonade? Consider Spitta refreshed. Good call.

Brunch
CFO: "Tony the Tiger certified these flakes" (from "Jetsgo"). We're assuming that Curren$y has an entire kitchen cabinet full of those single serving cereal boxes, direct from the factory.
DBO: "Got 20 minutes free, how 'bout a fast brunch?/Pitch me whatever proposals you want/No promises though, I've got a lot on my plate/No ham omelettes I'm on my conglomerate" ("Money Machine"). Note: egg whites only if you want to get on Curren$y's good side.
HEO: "Tomato soup and grilled cheese/hope it make it to my room before I leave" ("Fly Out (Part Tres)"). Look, this room service would be faster if we were using low quality ingredients, but this is aged cheddar and taleggio, bruh.

Afternoon/evening courses
CFO: "Cooking all kinds of bull[bleep]/suckatash stuck to the dishes/wonder why I won't eat with ya" (from "Example"). We knew this potluck plan was going to backfire sooner or later. Just go ahead take Spitta out to a restaurant.
DBO: "Running circles around them/they're rotisserie chickens" ("BBS"). No, totally, Curren$y loves your idea and really wants to hear more. Drumstick, er, um, drumroll please.
HEO: "Roll bamboos in the Bahamas, mama/It's either that or them strawberry coladas" ("Breakfast"). Cocktails on the beach, and we assume you mean a good bamboo shoot salad here, right? Sounds relaxing to us.

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