We went to Disneyland together. And Disney World. Twice. There were summer sports camps. A trip to SeaWorld. White Sox, Bears and Bulls games. Not just regular-season basketball—I'm talking playoff games during the Michael Jordan era. She also bought me encyclopedias. (Reading is an adventure. Hey, it brought me here.) Yes, my mom did that.
As Mother's Day approaches Sunday, we should admit it: Sometimes the greeting cards get it right. Mothers have a special place in all of our hearts, and unabashed mom-lovers have no shame. Truth is, even the tough, ice-cold, leather-skin types of guys have a soft spot for the women who brought us into the world.
You can throw all that blue-collar, hard-as-nails Chicago stuff out the window when it comes to moms. Friendly ribbing is fine and dandy until that first "yo mama" joke is administered. People do not play when it comes to Ma Dukes. At all.
Some of the toughest dudes out there will admit that. Artists such as Tupac Shakur ("Dear Mama"), Kanye West ("Hey Mama") and The Intruders ("I'll Always Love My Mama") have written heartfelt odes to their mothers.
It's possible for a wife or girlfriend to change and switch up on you, but not a mother. Tough guys around the world are grateful for the consistency of a mom.
Think about it, tough guys: What makes you so ferocious? Where do you think you got that warrior spirit? Your environment? Sure, your surroundings left an impression on your inner tough guy, but no one on Earth has influenced Billy Badasses worldwide like Mother Dearest.
New York MC Nas once rapped, "A killer got a moms, son, that's why his luck is never running up." Despite the unconditional love, you'd better believe a strong mom is going to be tough on her offspring. Moms tell it like it is regardless. Constructive criticism is one of the calling cards of a tough guy's mom. (Mine, for example, always complains about how often I use slang in my columns. Although what she calls slang is "urban vernacular swag" to me, but I still appreciate the feedback. Thanks, Mom!)
That's why moms are the best for tearing down tough-man walls. Many mothers had to be tough just to be able to help raise a strong male figure—sometimes without the help of a dad. (Side note: Much love to dads. You'll get yours in June.)
Your mom is the reason you have so much compassion in your heart. Your mom is the reason you're not outside breaking stuff and being destructive. There's never a dull moment with a mom. Not around mine. Especially if she's cooking her mac 'n' cheese casserole. It's the bomb ... I mean, it's quite delicious.
On behalf of tough guys everywhere, I'd like to say: Happy Mother's Day!
GRANT YANNEY IS A REDEYE SPECIAL CONTRIBUTOR.