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Can this nice guy finish first for Bears?

February 02, 2012|By Bag Boy, For RedEye

Character, not characters.

I see the Bears stunned no one and went with Phil Emery as their new general manager. Oh, I can see why. Look at these stunning credentials: Character. Hardworking. Honesty. Integrity. Hardworking. Character.

Yeah, OK. I'm really sick of that guy. Sound familiar? Here are others who had those traits: Dave Wannstedt, Dick Jauron, Mark Hatley, Jerry Angelo, Jack Pardee, Neill Armstrong, Abe Gibron and Jim Dooley.

I'd rather have the guy nobody likes but will kick some tail (yes, that's Mike Ditka. Sorry, he lives). And George Halas himself, back in the day.

Now from the morgue in Lake Forest we get the goody-goodies. Ted Phillips, George McCaskey and this guy.

But, Emery, you alone can make it up to me. You said "this is a big man's game," so I'm assuming no more midgets like Garrett Wolfe. Yay!

You can be a big man yourself and sign receiver Vincent Jackson. He's big. Do the thing Lovie did a few years back and fly the guy here yourself if you have to. Make him a Corleone offer and get it done.

Beyond that, I'll be watching a real football family, the Maras, as they prepare to meet New England. I'll never understand how the Giants got the Maras, the Steelers got the Rooneys, and we got these people. Heck, the Packers don't even have owners. The town owns them! Maybe we can have something like that!

I'm dreaming.

I'm also dreaming the Bulls aren't going to the NBA Finals. They can't beat the Heat. The Heat are better. They just are. And getting Joel Przybilla (career: four points a game) won't help. Four points a game.

This irks me: Joakim Noah says the $60 million deal "hurt his game." Unless you spent it, we'll take some back. Sheesh.

And now I'm really worried about the Blackhawks. Losing is happening a lot, brutal trip ahead and no one is stepping up.

I'd look toward spring training, but there's nothing there either.

Bag Boy is a RedEye special contributor.

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