The Wu-Tang Clan is coming to the Congress Theater on Sunday and ... can I be honest? I'm feeling kinda weird about it.
Don't get me wrong. I'm a stupid huge fan of the Killa Bees. They're amazing. I remember hearing their music on my cousin's tape deck and seeing their videos on The Box. (High-five if you remember The Box.) I even got emotional when ODB left this planet.
What gets me is they're billing the show as a reunion concert, which I guess makes sense. It's rare that all eight surviving members (I don't consider hanger-on Cappadonna a full Wu-Tanger) are on the same stage.
When I heard Wu-Tang was coming to Chicago, I experienced a brief moment of excitement, but that was followed by dread. The Clan are now looked at as legends in the rap scene. I remember when they got big.
Now it's time for a reunion tour? Am I that old? Is what I consider popular culture not the case anymore?
There was a time when I knew every song on the Billboard chart. Now? I'm looking at my co-workers like, "What the hell is an Avicii?"
When I'm out, people are prattling on and on about new shiny things that I don't understand. It's annoying. And yes, I know I'm only 26. People older than me are experiencing this on a far greater scale, but you know what? Pipe down—ain't nobody talking to you guys right now.
This column is dedicated to everyone 25 and younger who has the sheer testicular fortitude to complain about getting "older." Fun fact: The only known alternative to aging is death. Good luck with that. Also, shut the hell up. Allow me to be the Ghost of Pop Culture Past.
Back in my day, Justin Timberlake wasn't a dapper guy everyone loved. He was a guy who wore acid-washed denim suits. In public. #NeverForget
Whew! Rant over.
Now that I've gotten that blind fury out of my system, what's the next step? Trying to keep up with current trends at the expense of my health and sanity? No one wants to be the old dude at the club. (Looking your way, Diddy.) Do I abandon all hope of staying current and just cling to the stuff I liked when I was 15? (Looking at you, people who claim they only like "classic hip-hop.") Do I just say screw it and just go full-Juggalo?
It's enough to drive someone insane. Maybe that's the solution. Calm down, have a drink or three and realize that you aren't going to always be the tastemaker.
You won't be the one who knows where the super-secret speakeasy is. But the thing few people realize? That's not a bad thing.
You can be as cool as you want to be if you're ultimately the only one you're trying to impress. If the band you like isn't popular anymore, don't stress. You'll never have to worry about the show selling out! See? Things are looking up already.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm off to go listen to "It'z Yourz" on repeat. Wu-Tang now, and Wu-Tang forever.
ERNEST WILKINS IS CHICAGO'S WINGMAN. ERWILKINS@TRIBUNE.COM | @REMIXCHICAGO